Monday, May 15, 2006

Weight, money and self-punishment

So yesterday I went to this financial workshop, and let me tell you, it was GREAT! I’ve been to other ones, but a lot of times the people leading them seem so aggressive, so in-your-face, that it puts me off a little. I don’t WANT to be one of those obnoxious people. But this one yesterday was something I went to on a whim; it was free, which is to say they took donations (they called them “love offerings”), but no one stood at the door and took $100 of my money to tell me bone-headed things that any fool already knows.

Tangent: my mom went to a workshop where they were preaching the gospel of, “cut up your credit cards, and pay them off with every spare cent you have,” and my mom asked, “So, if I’m not supposed to put anything in savings or anything else till those cards are paid off, what do I do when my car breaks down? I won’t have money in the savings account to pay cash for it, and I need a car, so my only option is to put it on a credit card. Now THAT seems dumb, if I’m trying to pay OFF my cards!!” The guy didn’t have an answer. Ha! So my mom split her extra cash between a savings account and paying off her cards; took her longer to pay them off, but she didn’t have to put emergency expenses back on the card! I love my mom . . . :D

Anyway, back to this workshop. The woman who ran it was so cool – she was up front and practical without being mean, and I just really liked her. She also had some interesting ideas (which I’ve heard elsewhere, and think are valid) about why people go into debt. She believes it’s a (socially acceptable) form of self-punishment, and that if you are in debt, you haven’t forgiven yourself or someone else for something. So she starts with forgiveness.

I thought that was really interesting, because the last couple of weeks I’ve been feeling like I was making really good progress with the compulsive eating (another form of self-punishment), but suddenly my spending is out of control. Seriously. Not anything major, but those little things add up. For instance, I have very full lips. Not Angelina Jolie-full, but close. So there’s no reason on God’s green earth that I need a “lip plumper” for $30 from the makeup counter. But guess what I bought the other day? Mm-hmm. Ridiculous. And that stuff adds up really fast. Suddenly I’ve spent a hundred or two that I don’t really have on crap like makeup and new shoes. I DON’T NEED THIS STUFF!!! Geez. And I’m trying to pay OFF some credit cards, so putting more stuff ON them doesn’t make a lot of sense. :P But for some reason, I just buy it compulsively.

But . . . if it’s a form of self-punishment, then it makes sense that if I’m not punishing myself with food, I have to find another way to punish myself. Apparently my inner brat thinks trinkets are a good way to do that. Grrr.

Anyway, all that to say that this is some interesting work I’m doing here. Who knew that wanting to have more energy (and hopefully lose some weight in the process) would really entail all this emotional spelunking? Ok, well, I knew, but I was hoping I was wrong. :P Oh, well.

WARNING: Shameless product plug ahead! :)
If you want to check this lady out, go to her website: or you can find her book at any bookstore: “The Four Spiritual Laws of Prosperity.” I think that’s the right title, but her name is Edwene Gaines, and I KNOW that’s right. So if you’re interested, you should be able to find it under her name, even if I jacked up the title just now.

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